Recently, I read through the Christmas story according to the Apostle Paul as written in Philippians 2:3-8.  As I was reading, a few thoughts came to mind: What is the Christmas attitude? What attitude does the Lord want us to have during the Christmas season? What attitude does the Lord want us to have throughout the year?  Verse five stood out to me, where it says to have the same attitude which was also in Jesus.  Reading through v.3-8, we see how Jesus' attitude was throughout the Christmas story.  Three words come to mind that summarize Jesus' Christmas attitude for us:

R, Regard -- Regard the needs of others, and regard others more highly
E, Exchange -- Exchange an attitude of waiting to be served for an attitude of waiting to serve
D, Do -- Do God's will (obey) and serve others

I was pleasantly surprised when I saw that these three words -- Regard, Exchange, and Do -- form an acronym spelling R.E.D.!  As we go about during this Christmas season, whenever we see the color red, may we be reminded to have the same attitude that Jesus had -- regarding the needs of others, exchanging a heart that wants to be served for one that wants to serve, and doing God's will.

Merry Christmas!
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PS: For some good fun, check out the video below that I took last year while spending Christmas at a Karen village in Thailand.  The video shows the caretakers and kids of a Christian children's home taking part in various Christmas festivities.  Rather than celebrate Christmas on only one day, the Karen celebrate Christmas throughout the entire month of December, calling the month "Sweet December".  I really like that idea!
(NOTE: You may want to pause the music video playing in the left column of this blog before playing this video)

Today I received the following message from my pastor:
"Dawn Samoa-Grise passed away today.  She was one of your prayer warriors at Calvary Chapel ______."

I first met Dawn at my home church many years ago.  The first thing you would notice about her was her feet.  She had a strange condition that caused her skin to grow flaky black scales.  Her feet looked like they were charred, and she had to wear special shoes because of the pain caused by the condition.  After noticing her feet, you might next notice her weight and see that she was quite obese.  If you were blind and did not notice her charred cankles, you would probably notice the smell of cigarettes that seemed to always cling to her clothing.  Concerning appearances, she wasn't exactly the kind of person that you would rush to talk to.

Dawn had a teenage daughter from one man, a young son with another man, and a teenage step-daughter from the father of her son.  Dawn's children were rebellious and often fought with each other.  It seemed they never listened to her, nor were they ever content.  Suffice it to say that her home life was very dysfunctional.  The pain in her body due to her skin condition and the pain in her heart due to her family problems were very difficult for her to bear.  Dawn had more burdens than I have ever carried, and at times you could tell that they wore down on her.

When I first met Dawn, I didn't try particularly hard to talk with her.  She looked strange and simply was not the kind of person I wanted to go out of my way to associate with.  Sometimes after I played guitar for worship service she would come up to me and hug me, and I would give a weak-hearted hug in return.

When I say all this, it probably sounds cruel and cold-hearted -- which is exactly how I want it to sound, because it is the truth.  Many times we harbor darkness in our hearts that we would never admit is present.  But thanks be to God that he brought Dawn's light to illuminate the darkness.

When I moved to Thailand, Dawn was one of the people that always seemed to stick by me.  Every time I went back to the States, she was one of the people that would rush to find me at church and ask me how things were going.  She wanted to hear stories about the Karen, how the work was going with the Karen, and how I was doing.  She was always enthusiastic about buying Karen clothing that I or others would bring back to sell at church.  One time she specifically made a request that I buy a Karen bag of a certain color and bring it back for her.  (I cannot remember whether I did or not.)  She would always go to any event at church that pertained to Thailand and ministry in Thailand, and she would often go out of her way to bless me, encourage me, and give me a big cushy hug.  A couple years ago she sent me the following email:

"Hello Chris !  I hope this email finds you healthy and enjoying your work for God you are doing there.  What a great joy it is for you that you get to be there learning what you are and also being a servant of God for the Karen.  I always think how great it would be if I was younger and healthier, I would love to be a missionary in an orphanage  in Samoa or Tonga.  I pray all the time that 1 of my children will take the direction of being a missionary before going to college or even after college.  I enjoyed the slide show we had at Tuesday night at Bible Study after the group got back from Thailand.  You look great clean shaven much younger.  I would like to try to send you a care package if you send me a list of some snack food items you like and I think I will throw In some candies for you to pass around to all the kids I saw in the slides there and for any other kids too.
Hope to hear from you soon.
God Bless.
Dawn"

I never emailed her back.  Nevertheless, when I saw her months later, she came up to me with a big smile and hug.

Over time, I saw and felt more and more of her love and concern for me.  Even though her life was filled with pain and sorrow, she always went out of her way to encourage and pray for me.  At some point, I forgot about her exterior and saw her for the beautiful sister in the Lord that she was.  Gone was my focus on her exterior; instead, God opened my eyes to see how precious she really was.  As my pastor told me when he notified me of her death, Dawn was one of my prayer warriors at church.  I think of the tough times I have experienced in my personal life over the past couple years, how many times I came within milimeters of calling it quits.  I wonder how big a part Dawn played in keeping me going by her prayers.  I will miss her prayers.  I will miss her humility.  I will miss her presence.  I will miss her flaky chared cankles.  I will miss her cushy hugs.  I will miss the light that Dawn brought into my life.

Now, as I think of the day when I will see her again, I think of the joy she is now experiencing in the Lord.  Standing before the presence of God, Dawn is no longer bound by the chains of sorrow, nor is she bound any longer to the pain of a corrupted body.  She is free from her chains, free from the disease -- forever to enjoy a new body in the presence of the light of Christ.  No longer in darknes, a new Dawn has risen.

Dawn, I'll see you when I get there!

"How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news..." ~Isaiah 52:7

24 = 2*2*2*3 = (2^3)*3

Three years ago I turned 24.

During the few months leading up to my 24th birthday, I regularly watched the action-packed TV show “24”.  For those who do not know, ‘24’ is a drama “presented in real time, with each season depicting a 24-hour period in the life of Jack Bauer, who works with the U.S. government as it fights domestic threats” (wikipedia).  Each season, Jack takes on massive terrorist threats and other dangers to US national security, all while not showering or using the bathroom over the course of 24 hours.  Amazing… Simply amazing!  Of course, it is thrilling to watch Jack Bauer single-handedly thwart the worlds’ terrorist organizations, dangers, jerks, and Nina Myers.

Now, back to my 24th birthday.  On my 24th birthday, I made the decision to move to Thailand and work with Karen refugees along the Thai-Burma border.  My aspiration was to minister to both spiritual and physical needs of Karen refugees, just as Christ teaches us to do for all.  I very clearly remember thinking at that time, “This year I’m 24 years old, so this year is going to be action packed just like the show ‘24’!  This is going to be my Jack Bauer year!  YEAH!”  I was excited at what kind of explosive year it was going to be.  I had fire in my heart to take up the task of helping bring relief to refugees and shining the light of Christ.

The three years that have passed since that day have not been what I expected.  To be sure, I have seen blessings along the way, the greatest of which was seeing my dad come to faith in Jesus and watching him get baptized in a jungle stream on my brother’s birthday.  I cannot express how huge this is.  If my three years in Thailand were spent just for the sake of seeing this, then I consider my time here well spent.  Period.

But concerning my aspiration to join in the effort to bring light to the Thai/Burma border region, life has taken such a different course than what I had originally expected on my 24th birthday, the day I decided to come to Siam.  I expected to jump into the work and to do great things with the Lord, to be a Jack Bauer for the Lord.  I would take on the Thai language, move to the border area, take on the Karen language, adapt to life in the outer regions, and kick Satan’s donkey.  But instead, as I look over the past three years, I see something very different.  What I see is not explosive conversions and action-packed relief runs.  What I see is a landscape littered with
.     Loneliness
.          Loss of identity
.               Dark realities of the world
.                    Personal weaknesses
.                         Personal failures
.                              Family sorrow from separation
The enemy has not been simply the outer darkness that I thought I would battle with, such as the refugee situation, spiritual blindness, and other problems you see out here.  Rather, more often than not the enemy has been the inner darkness, the weaknesses that are within that affect every day life, the weaknesses that you don’t see until you’re in a situation or place you have never known.  This is where the battle has been.  Perhaps in this sense, life has been like the show ‘24’, where the real problem wasn’t the foreign terrorists bringing WMDs into the country, but rather the mole/traitor on the inside that was allowing the terrorist to come in.  You start off thinking the problem is the guy on the outside, only to find out that it’s the bad guy on the inside who is the real problem.

Three years have passed since my 24th birthday, and I cannot say that I had my ‘24’-like year…

But today as I am on the threshold of my 27th birthday, reality is much more like a very different ‘24’ – not the show ‘24’, but rather the song ‘24’ (Switchfoot).  The song ‘24’ is about realizing one’s weaknesses, taking responsibility for one’s failures and not running from them, and letting Christ heal those dead works and restore us:

Life is not what I thought it was… twenty-four hours ago
I’m not who I thought I was… twenty-four hours ago
Twenty-four reasons to admit that I’m wrong… with all my excuses, still twenty-four strong
But see, I'm not copping out… when You're raising the dead in me
I am the second man now

Three years ago I was 24, and I did not know myself.  Today I am 27, and I know... more.  Today, as I consider the past three years, I must decide what to do next.  I don’t want to cop out.  I want to go forward.

Exodus 14:15

This is what we must do: We must believe that God is big, and go forward.

27 = 3*3*3 = (3^3)

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Reflection on a trip to Northern Thailand:

Last Sunday, I visited a Chinese church.
Last Tuesday, I hung out with a Shan immigrant.
Last Wednesday, I visited an Akha children's home.
Yesterday, I visited the Mekong Minority Foundation and met Hmong, Karen, Mien, Farang, Thai, Lahu, and Akha social workers.
Today I had a free day in Chiang Rai, so I hit the town, found a Thai music school, and studied the khim (ขิม), a traditional Thai musical instrument.
In the evening I hung out with a bunch of Mien youth selling food at a market.
Tomorrow I plan to go to an intertribal (Hmong, Akha, etc.) church in the morning, and an international church in the evening.
In a week I'll meet up with a half-Mexican, half-Native American friend who came out to Thailand to learn about ministry opportunities.
Yet another week later, I'll go back to West Central Thailand and spend time with Karen, Mon, and Burmese kids.

Chinese... Shan... Akha... Mien... Hmong... Karen... Farang... Thai... Lahu... Mexican... Native American... Mon... Burmese...

"I tip my hat to this colorful arrangement!"  I see the beauty in the tones of our skin, the shades of our cultures. Variety is the spice of life, indeed!  What a joy it is to experience the spectrum of cultures in our world!  Such beauty and variety reflects the creativity of our Maker who made us in His image.

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PS: The khim music lessons cost only $5.80 for two hours.  Rock on!

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Verse of the Update:
Titus 1:15
"To the pure all things are pure, but to those who are defiled and unbelieving nothing is pure; but even their mind and conscience are defiled."

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Stuff of the Update:
The other day, I was walking around at a movie theatre in Bangkok.  The theatre hung up on the wall various posters for upcoming movies.  One movie was entitled, "Soi Cowboy", or something like that.  The poster had the pictures of a nasty looking older Thai man and a pregnant young Thai woman.  I suddenly realized that the movie is about the infamous Soi Cowboy -- that famous street of debauchery in Thailand named after the American soldiers that once frequented its shops for prostitution "services".  Half a nanosecond after this realization hit me, I was hit by another realization-- the name of this street sounds all-too similar to the name of my xanga site.  WHAT A BUMMER! I thought.

So, why does my xanga site sound so similar to this prostitution street?  As it turns out, in Northern Thailand there is a noodle dish called "khaawsoi" (ข้าวซอย).  (Click here for pictures.)  This dish consists of curry broth, egg noodles, and one's choice of meat, which I usually elect to be chicken.  This is one of my favorite dishes in Thailand, such that I decided to name my xanga site after it.  To add a touch of American culture to my name, which is befitting of the fact that I'm an American, I decided to add to my xanga name that classic icon of American culture, the Cowboy.  Thus, we have the following equation:
..:: XANGA NAME:  "khaawsoi" + "cowboy" = "khaawsoicowboy" ::..
Note that this is to be read as "khaaw-soi cowboy", where the leading syllable is a long-vowel sound.  This is written in Thai as "ข้าวซอย Cowboy".  For the purpose of making the name look more aesthetically pleasing to the eyes, I shortened the name to "khawsoicowboy".

The problem arises when the name is read differently than I had originally intended.  If the name is instead read as, "khaw soicowboy", where the leading syllable is spoken with a short-vowel and separated from the "soi" syllable, the meaning in Thai in then changed to, "go down Soi Cowboy" -- something that I never want to do, nor would I ever want to give off the impression that I would ever want to go there!  Here is a comparison of the correct and incorrect readings:
CORRECT:  "ข้าวซอย Cowboy", or "khaawsoi Cowboy". Note: ข้าว (khaaw) is spoken with a long vowel.
INCORRECT:  "เข้า ซอย Cowboy", or "khaw Soi Cowboy". Note: เข้า (khaw) is spoken with a short vowel.

In naming my xanga "khawsoicowboy", I accidentally made two mistakes.  First, I unwittingly created a name that sounds a lot like a prostitution joint in Bangkok.  Second, the only part of the name that would differentiate it from the prostitution joint, namely the long-vowel sound of khaaw (ข้าว), I changed from a long-vowel to a short-vowel (เข้า), thus making it sound even more like that nasty prostitution joint.  Thus, for all those people who have heard of the infamous Soi Cowboy, to them my xanga name sounds like something dreamt up by one of those nasty looking dudes who frequent that nasty place.  ALAS!

So, for the sake of not miscommunicating to all those people who overthink things to the same insane extent as me, I am going to temporarily change my name from "khawsoicowboy" to "khaawsoicowboy".  At a later time, perhaps I will create a completely new name that is less susceptible to being misunderstood.  

I will still continue to love "khaawsoi", and I will still continue to value my American culture!

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EDIT:
Grrr... I just tried to change my xanga name, but I can't change it unless I pay $10 (or 10,000 xanga credits)!  That's too bad.  I guess I'll have to wait and hope that nobody misunderstands my xanga name, hahahahahahahahahah.  Am I worrying too much here?    LOL